Penn State School Color Power Rankings

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Editor’s Note: This story is part of Onward State’s April Fool’s Day series. It’s satirical, intended to entertain and not to be taken at face value. All quotes were made for the purposes of this article.

Penn State is a university with traditions – traditions that many have strong opinion on.

The university’s school colors are instantly recognizable as symbols of the institution. Walking around campus, it’s not uncommon to see almost every passer-by don these same colors. And although we all love them, there are East a clear hierarchy between them.

With pride for Dear Old State, we have meticulously researched to definitively rank Penn State’s school colors.

1. Blue

Blue was the easy choice for our top spot. Some might call blue “basic,” but we believe it’s the soul of Penn State’s color scheme.

The particular shade of blue, navy, is deep. It’s rich. It affirms strength. Penn State blue is unapologetic. It’s definitely black, but it also lacks the brightness typically associated with other shades of blue sold.

Think about it.

Blue is a pillar of the visual and emotional world.

Blue is inside everything. Blue stands for meaning.

Blue is the ocean. Blue is the sky. Blue is the flame of a scented candle that flickers during the dark hours of the night.

Sonic. Point. Dory. The Avatar… all blue.

Blueberries. Blue raspberry. Blue crab. Blue whale.

Blue caps. Blue topaz. Blue blood.

Plan. Bluegrass.

Blue Jeans.

Blue cheese.

Blue man group. Blue’s clues. Cult of the blue oyster. Comma of the Toronto Blue Jays.

Blue is peace. Blue is love. Blue is purity.

Blue eyes on the face of a newborn.

The Blues.

The blue screen of death.

Hell, even Onward State’s hyperlinks are blue.

Blue is tears. Blue is absence. Blue is needed.

Blue is unmistakable in its pursuit of catharsis. Blue parallels the celestial expansion of the vast and infinite cosmos.

Blue is safety. Blue is order. Blue is calm. Blue is true.

The blue shimmers. Blue swirls. The blue swell.

Blue shakes your hand and means it.

Blue is the better Penn State school colors.

2. White

It’s boring. ¯_(ツ)_/¯

Sam is a junior double major in political science and journalism from Ashburn, Virginia. He’s a Dallas Cowboys fan who relishes the misery of Eagles fans. Any hateful comments can be directed to [email protected] or @TheSammer88 on all social media platforms.

He may or may not read every comment he receives.

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